Published on February 18, 2005 By averjoe In Misc
The funniest story I heard on television last year was on the program Live With Regis And Kelly (Yes, I do peek in on this program occasionally. I watch many programs occasionally. Rarely do I regularly watch any program on television though.).

Regis told a story about meeting Jack Nicholson at a dinner party after screening a film Nicholson starred in. I’m going to try and tell it but I probably won’t do it justice. I can’t capture the unique mannerisms of Regis.

Anyway Regis was sitting at a table with a group of celebrities and Nicholson was sitting at another table. The hostess of the event asked Regis if he wanted to meet Jack. Regis said something like, “no, no, I don’t want to bother him right now” but the hostess kept pushing Regis so Regis got up and followed the hostess over to the table Jack was at.

The hostess standing behind Jack’s chair said to Jack that Regis would like to meet him and Jack started to wave his arms and said, “no, no, not now”. The hostess continued to try and get Jack to greet Regis while Regis was standing just behind the hostess unbeknownst to Jack.

Things eventually became so unbearable to Regis that he jumped from behind the hostess and in front of Jack and said in a Nicholson like fashion, “Hi yah, Jack!!!!!!!” and Jack then jumped up and said, “Reeegiisss!!!”

Of course I did not do this story justice but it was a funny story and had me laughing most of the day just thinking about it. The story sounds so Hollywood.

The funnies thing that happened to me recently happened while I was working on a women’s computer. It had stopped playing DVDs and the printer didn’t work.

There were some ladies in the house and I said to one of them, “go get me some DVDs so I can test this thing out”. A few minutes later the woman came back to me and squeezed her tits that were spilling out of her bra together and said, “here’s your DVDs”. Now that was funny.

The stupidest thing I saw on television was on the Jay Leno hosted Tonight Show. John the announcer was having his jeep ‘decked out’ into the ‘cool mobile’. The shop gave it a new paint job, rims, televisions (???) and a movie projector (???).

Yes, I said televisions. There was a wide screen television right behind the rear seats so that when the rear door opened you faced a TV, there were TVs on the back of the driver’s seat and front passenger seat so people sitting in the back could watch television, and there was a TV in the front dash so that the front seat passenger and the driver (WHAT!) could watch television.

On top of that on the hood of the jeep what at first glance seemed to be part of the engine was a movie projector (unbelievable). Who is going to be watching the road? It was ridiculous.

This is a good time to rate the late night talk shows that are in the Tonight Show model. As I said I am not a consistent watcher of any one television program so this is my opinion from a sample of the programs I experienced.

Jon Stewart’s program on, I think the comedy channel is the funniest of the bunch. Theoretically he should be able to move onto regular broadcast television successfully but the viewing public is not too predictable.

Next is Conan O’ Brien. His humor on many occasions is quite irreverent. I don’t know what he is going to do when he takes over the Tonight Show. His sometime biting or racy bits may have to be toned down.

O’ Brien is the best (which in this case means the funniest) in the interview in my opinion. It is not that he is necessarily trying to be funny all the time. He just is.

The third is Jay Leno. His opening monologues use to be the best in my view but of late they aren’t that funny.

Coming in fourth is David Letterman. Never was much of a fan of his opening routine. I never thought that most of it was that funny. Occasionally he’ll have a very funny top ten list or something within his program.

Coming in last on my list is Jimmy Kimmel Live. His irreverence is sometime too extreme for my taste and/or just isn’t funny to me.

I think I missed one or two late night talk show host but that is because I have not watched their programs enough to come to any conclusions.


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